Doing the right thing! I was somehow obsessed with this school of thought. It all starts with very naïve things like don’t eat with your mouth full and goes on to more complex things like don’t cheat in exams, lie, or gossip. As I can’t and wouldn't want to speak for others here, I would much rather talk about myself. As a child I was never forced to follow any rigid religious rules. Though I hail from a traditional family, I have never been forced to go to the temple, starve myself or be an untouchable when it’s that time of the month.

My parents always had faith in me and my decisions. And thank God, till date that unquestionable faith is unshakeable. So when I decided to marry someone who was not of my “caste”, I knew very well that there are going to be lots of comments. Like always my parents stood by me, and I did not need anyone else’s validation. They were convinced I have chosen a person who I am going to be happy with and that’s what matters. Till date I get a strange reaction from curious aunties for marrying a Parsi. “Do you go to the fire temple?” “What food do you make at home?” Ok first of all get a life, and second, live it!

I strongly believe that we live in a free world. And everyone has a right to follow their own faith. But to deem that your faith is superior to any other faith is something I refuse to agree. And I have come across several individuals who are extremely touchy when it comes to religion. And they believe they have to follow it only because they are born in a certain family, which has been following it for generations. And when we say “my God” or “my religion”, who exactly are we defending? Because God does not need to be defended! He/She stands in the light of his pure aura and truth. And truth never needs justification. It’s only our twisted version of truth in the form of ego that needs explanation and validation. And aren’t we “humans” before we are Hindu, Jains, Parsis, or Christians? So when we see a hurt person, who was rammed into by a vehicle, are we going to help him because of the faith he follows, or because a fellow human is in trouble and needs help?

The society was once formed so that we can create a world that’s peaceful and grow to our full potential. But how come this very society is hampering our growth. Envy, vengeance, resentment, insecurity, these are just few monstrous demons residing inside each one of us. So when a 20 something or 30 something girl is finding it hard to find love, people either look at her with pity or scrutiny; and then the people interrogated are the parents! “Are you looking for boys?” “What’s up with her?” “How old will she be this year?” I don’t think anyone who is not looking after her emotionally or financially has any right to question her or her family.

And it’s not like it ends there. Even if a young girl does manage to find love and is leading her life peacefully there is a new set of questions she is bombarded with. Now that you are married, what’s the next step; make babies obviously. When did it become everyone else’s business as to when a couple should start a family? If they are not directly giving you conception advice, they ask you the same damn thing every time; is good news on its way? Well, if it is then you will know soon; not like I will be able to keep it a secret for a long time and label it water retention.

Maybe it’s a great idea to do things at the right age. Start work early, get married soon and have children when your energy levels are soaring high. But at the same time, is it not important that you do something when it feels right to you? And you are doing it because you want to devote to motherhood, because you are ready to be a parent and enjoy every minute of raising a child; yes even the frustrating things. And not because you are a certain age and others think that you should have a baby!

Sigh! If only people would devote 1% of their total energy in looking at their own life and path instead of telling others what’s right for them and what isn’t!  

Having grown up in a household where I was and still am always allowed to voice my opinion – good and bad, the toughest thing for me is to witness something wrong, unjust happening around me and not speak my mind. When I was a little girl, my mom used to explain to me that things in life aren’t always black and white. She had tried to convey to me that there may be lots of situations when despite disagreeing with the decisions taken by others you may have to eat your words and keep quiet.

Though I refused to understand the logic, at seven, at 25 I kind of comprehend why she said what she said. I never got along with the queen bees in school, and got into trouble several times for confronting bullies and “mean girls”. At points I found myself alone or with very few friends. I was almost convinced that something is wrong with me as I have trouble getting along with most people. But then something wonderful happened. I started coming across people who were really nice to me and we formed a clique of our own.

Today, I really feel blessed to be part of a family where I was treated like an equal ever since I was a child. Drifting slightly away from the original topic of conversation; I feel extremely angry when adults talk down to children. Is it because they can? Or is it because they want to abuse their power to the fullest before the tables turn? Phrases like “you are too young to understand”, “I said no once, which means a final NO, so stop asking”, and the worst one “Children should not interfere when adults are talking”. Why? Are they afraid he/she may say something you don’t want to hear? Or tell it like it is – the truth, which adults can slyly manipulate.

I dedicate this article to my fabulous mother, who always encouraged me to speak the truth. Though she warned me several times that speaking my mind may not always be the best solution, she never stopped me from pointing out right from wrong.