My Experience: Sarah Maria, Body Image Expert
Description:
Author: Sarah Maria

Sarah Maria is a body-image expert who helps people learn how to love their bodies and love their lives. Her book, Love Your Body, Love Your Life, will be available in November '09. She combines ancient spiritual wisdom with modern transformational techniques to help people create a body and a life that they love. Her work has been endorsed by well-known authors and spiritual teachers, including Deepak Chopra and Marci Shimoff (featured teacher in The Secret), among others, as well as by numerous physicians and psychologists. Learn more about her and her work at www.breakfreebauty.com.


I have a personal story to share:


As you know, I recently moved to San Diego. It is sunny and beautiful and I am excited for this next chapter in my life and career to unfold.


One of my favorite hobbies is physical exercise (it helps keep me sane with long hours in front of the computer - I am sure you can empathize…), so I decided to join a gym right near my new home.


I went into the gym and told them I was interested in membership. The people at the front desk quickly paged a New Membership Specialist, who ushered me to sit down while he asked me some questions about my health and fitness goals.


He began:


“Why are you interested in a gym membership?”


“Well, I really enjoy physical exercise. It is fun, makes me feel good, keeps me sane, and keeps me fit,” I replied.


He continued:


“What are you looking to get from your membership?”


“Continued health and fitness,” I answered.


“Are you looking to change anything? Lose any inches or tone any particular areas?”


I thought for a second.


“No, nope, not looking to change anything. Just wanting to have fun and stay fit and healthy,” I replied.


He looked at me with a bit of shock and awe.


“Really??? That’s great - that’s really great. I have been doing this for four years and you’re the first person who has ever said that to me.”


I did a half-nod and smiled. We continued with a tour of the gym, I signed up as a member, and continued to think about what had just happened.


After pondering it for a while, I discovered the following:


First, I realized that I was really at peace with my body. I don’t say this to brag or boast in the least. Nor do I say it because my body is “perfect” according to some mainstream definition of beauty. My body is as human as anyone’s: as I get older parts are beginning to droop and sag and excess calories seem to stake a passionate claim to my mid-section, although my thighs also fight for their piece of the energy-storage pie…


Does this peace and acceptance mean I am not healthy? Of course not. Does this mean I eat junk food all the time and don’t exercise? Absolutely not. In fact, I am much healthier than when I was constantly wanting to change or improve something about my appearance.


Nor does it mean that I never have critical thoughts about my body or appearance because critical thoughts do still occasionally pass through the screen of my awareness.


But what it does mean is that I am at peace. I have a sense of peace and well-being that is not contingent upon everything looking a certain way or measuring up to some external standard. I am no longer feeling compelled by a constant sense of striving.


This same peace is available to you all the time, in each and every moment. And here is the beautiful thing - when you are at peace, you are much more likely to grow, evolve, and develop in positive and healthy ways.


Your body is constantly changing. Every hour, every minute, every second, your body is exchanging itself with the universe. The appearance of your body will change over time. The question is can you be at peace in the midst of change. Can you embrace the constant and dynamic change, knowing that this very change is what allows us to direct and improve our lives?


Here is one other point I wanted to share from this experience:


The new member specialist who asked me the questions does this five days a week for eight hours a day. He asks thousands of people whether or not they want to change something about themselves. And I was the first person who said “no”.


This fact is indicative of an underlying discontent that is practically ubiquitous in modern society. It is almost as if something is wrong with us if we don’t feel compelled to change something about ourselves. It is seemingly not okay to be comfortable with who you are.


So much of our society is premised on this belief that we are not okay as we are; that we cannot be at peace with ourselves. There is a constant drive to be more, do more, and have more that compels us to eat more, buy more, and do more in an attempt to feel whole and complete.


Here is the catch: often the striving is the very thing that prevents us from arriving. We think we need to change in order to be at peace, and change can sometimes bring relief.


But the flip side is true as well - the more at peace we can be, the more power and ability we have to become the people we want to become. When we live from a place of peace within ourselves, we realize that we no longer need to live in opposition to the world around us, whether it be our bodies, our relationships, or our careers. Instead, we can fashion an external world around us that reflects and reinforces our internal sense of peace and well-being.